Crush
by Miss Poirot
Summary: Goauld love. Not much to explain. Happens during Continuum. Million kisses to my dearest Kercsi for her beta-work.


Shikra blade. The atomic power cut the human body in half in a single moment. Qetesh threw away the blade. Red ruby-drops drizzled onto the floor as Ba'al's blood sprayed. She didn't even look back for the dead body. "You mustn't" she told herself. "You mustn't look back; you must go on with your plan!"

With her elemental Goa'uld force she hit back the Jaffas who were guarding the throne-room. She ran across a few corridors.

"You must go on, you did everything perfectly," she reassured herself. "Everything is fine. You must go on..."

She was not quite certain why she needs this mental encouraging. She killed him, because he was of no use to her anymore. He was in her way, he had to die! It's so simple. So, so simple... but...

"Stop! I must not think! I must carry out my plan step by step without thinking and remembering," she moaned. "I must speak with Kronos now. The Tau'ri must be eliminated. Such fun! It's a pity I can't see it myself, but I have more important things to get on with."

She did what she had to. She gave orders to Kronos concerning the Tau'ri and then began her journey to the time-machine. She knew now where all Ba'al's fantastic tactics had come from. He was a fool. He didn't even realise, what an unbelievable power he had in his hand! Qetesh knew.

She was smirking. She will be the Queen of the whole universe, she alone! And not only the Queen of the universe, she will control the time, the future, the past... Everything.

In the first two minutes of her travel she was satisfied and pleased. She was thinking of only her plan. Then it began...

Ba'al, standing in the throne-room. He was so proud of his queen, he touched her so tenderly...

"Enough!" she shouted at herself in her thoughts. "My travel doesn't take long, I'm nearly there. I must not think... Just a few minutes, I must go on with my plan and simply not think..."

Last night they had sex. Oh, it was not an extraordinary thing, it happened nearly every day, but the way they had it... That was somehow different. Normally Qetesh was tied roughly to the bed with thin, silvery naquadah-chains, Baal was on the top, and did to her whatever he wanted. She cursed, cried from pain and struggled fiercely, because she knew that he liked it that way and she didn't want his roughness at all. Of course she could hide her pain and be still all the same how he hurt her, but she made this idiot role-play to please him. She wanted to get the whole thing finished as fast as possible. And, must admit, she liked to see that queer pleasure in his glimmering eyes.

Last night was different. He was not cruel in the least. He kissed her body so many times that she got bored and nearly fell asleep. For hours he cuddled her, caressed her, stroked her hair.

"Are you OK, dear?" Qetesh made herself look anxious. "You are a bit weird tonight."

"I agree. It suits me more when I'm violent, but..." He stopped.

Qetesh smiled at his joke and was waiting for him to go on, but he stayed silent.

"But?" She became impatient. Why the bloody hell can't he explain the whole freaky thing and let her go to the sarcophagus and sleep?

"Now that we are so close to my entire victory, I suppose I can tell you the truth, my Queen" Ba'al panted.

Qetesh was not sure what would come next. She hoped he would finally reveal his plans about the Tau'ri. She became truly interested. Maybe she won't have to kill him... Maybe he will tell everything, and there's no use for violence against him. Maybe he can be useful for her. Maybe he has great plans, which can match hers. Maybe...

"I... I guess I'm in love with you" Ba'al admitted and started kissing her neck.

"Oh, damn it!" Qetesh thought, closed her eyes and shivered as if pain was running through her body. "We are Goa'uld, my sweet," she answered. "We don't have any feelings like that. You shouldn't tell silly lies to me."

"No, it's not a lie," he raised his voice, and finished kissing her. "We have been together for 50 years, I can't even imagine how I could sleep in my sarcophagus without you! I haven't had sex with any other woman since that moment I got you in prison on the Tea'frol planet. What the hell should love be if not this?"

"I suppose this is just... getting used to. It's more convenient to have a constant concubine, than always seeking for someone new. Maybe you're getting old and boring." Qetesh laughed, she believed he would not be hurt by such a jape. Generally he was the more arrogant and ironical from the two of them.

"You are the worst kind of bitch I have ever met" he cursed and pushed her aside.

"I'm sorry, my sweetheart. I was only kidding, I didn't mean it" Qetesh tried to stroke his chest, but he grabbed her wrist firmly and didn't let her finish the motion.

"You don't have any feelings for me, do you?" he murmured.

"We are Goa'uld" she repeated her former statement. "You know how it goes. If anything should happen and you could get more power by killing me, you would do it without the slightest hesitation. Our love is just a lie. Maybe at this moment we both say that we love each other, but tomorrow..."

"Stop it!" he was nearly shouting. He was cool and sarcastic, even humorous, this pure anger was not the kind of reaction she expected. "I have everything in the universe, but I can't even have one true feeling from my queen!"

"Oh, dear, it's no use thinking about this" she answered casually. "These stupid feelings have nothing to do with us. I'm your queen and I'll stay forever by your side. Until your death."

She leaned her head on his chest and closed her eyes.

"Don't worry about useless things" she whispered. "The execution of Apophis comes tomorrow. We shouldn't spoil that funny day."

"Qetesh, won't you ever tell me that you love me?" Ba'al asked quietly.

"Of course I'll tell you, just order it! If you commanded that..."

"No" The strange, sad look on his face suddenly disappeared. "You're right, my sweetie, we don't need these pathetic things!" He pushed her away and got up. He went across the room to the golden sarcophagus standing next to the brocade-curtain.

These pathetic things... Qetesh would have offered her favourite two Jaffas in return if someone could explain to her what the goddamn aching in her heart was which appeared when he spoke those words... He just admitted that she was right. And of course she was right! "Oh, well," she thought. "I really need some sleep."

She got up as well, joined him and lay on top of him in the sarcophagus. The lid closed above them automatically and she hugged him a bit stronger than usual before they fell asleep.

Now she was standing at the ring-platform, waiting for her Jaffas who were making the way clear to Ba'al's time machine.

"I... I killed him just because his Prime Jaffa interrupted us. I had to do something, otherwise he would have saved his lord and they would surely have killed me. It was the most astonishing I could find out. To kill him. That stupid Jaffa was really shocked..." Qetesh sighed.

"I am lying to myself. I was planning his death for years" she whispered. "But... but I couldn't... oh, no... Ba'al..."

Qetesh had that pain in her heart which she regarded as impossible to feel. Maybe it's not her own feeling. It must be her host. Her host is too weak. Just this stupid host...

But she knew that it's not her host. It's her. Her own Goa'uld body was writhing and twisting with agony around her host's spine.

"I suppose I got used to him. 50 years... uhm... long time. Yes, I guess, that's the problem." She shook her head. "Well, I have that time-machine! I can bring him back if I want. Maybe... it might happen someday."


End file.
